Progress

Sometimes I get bogged down in what isn’t going well.  Ayub is still a handful.  He’s still struggling in school.  He still has breakdowns and outbursts (although they are much less frequent and much shorter).  He still has trouble communicating at times.  He still has the energy of a Jack Russell Terrier on Mountain Dew.  He still gets dysregulated if things don’t go according to schedule.

But this weekend, we had a great day.  Sunday afternoon, we took all the kids to a college baseball game.  We are huge baseball fans and have had season tickets for several years.  We took the kids once, last spring, and it was a complete and utter disaster.  Therefore, we haven’t taken the whole family back since then.  But yesterday, we decided to give it another try.  We put Lucy down for an early nap, and then went to the game.  We took two cars, fully expecting that one of us would have to leave with the little kids.  But instead, they were great.  They had some snacks, watched the game (sort of), and crawled around the seats.  I was amazed.

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It lasted for more than two hours, then we had to leave to go to a friends’ going away party.  That’s right, after this first success, we decided we would take all the kids (minus Sam, who we dropped off at baseball practice) with us to the party.  There was a bouncy house, swing set, and lots of other kids.  Quite the overstimulating environment.  Yet, still, everyone did great.  So, being ones to push our luck, we decided to eat dinner out at a real restaurant, until Sam finished baseball practice.  And it was great.  With only minor electronic distraction, we were able to calmly wait until our food was delivered and eat without causing a huge scene.

To most of you, this would sound like a typical day.  Nothing out of the ordinary.  But to us, it was a huge milestone.  Doing THREE different things that we couldn’t have done a year ago was amazing.  It proved to me that we are getting there.  We are making progress.  And we will have a “normal” life once again.  It also showed me that I need to focus more on how far we’ve come than how far we have left to go.

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7 responses

  1. Sounds like great progress. We haven’t adopted but I have a lot of friends who have, from both US and abroad. I can’t imagine the adjustment and the struggles! Congratulations on a great day out.

  2. This is huge! Days like that are so satisfying and go a long way to help deal with whatever the future throws at you. Thanks for sharing this.

    AND, I received my hair care products. I am SO excited to dive in! THank you Thank you!

  3. I can only imagine that being parents of four kids is difficult enough, but the added adjustment period for an older child that’s new to the family must add extra layers of challenges to parenting that are overwhelming. The fact that you guys are making significant progress and have given Ayub a healthy environment to learn and mature and overcome struggles is a real testament to the kind of strength and love you have as parents. What a great example you are. God bless you guys!

  4. Oh, wow! I can totally appreciate how amazing this must have felt! We are not there yet… but soon, I hope. Congrats on such a wonderful day!

  5. This doesn’t sound like a normal day to me… that would be a lot for me to tackle, too! (And actually, we’ve got a day like that coming up on Saturday and I’m not sure if I’m more worried about how K will handle it or how I will handle it, particularly since Craig is otherwise occupied all day.) Good for you for giving it a shot and finding some sweet success! Also, good for you for taking time to step back and realize how things are going on a larger scale and for noticing the improvements. It must be hard to do that on a day-to-day basis, but good days like this can hopefully inspire you to again look at the big picture. Hooray! (And hooray for seeing a photo of you on the blog… you are usually on the other side of the lens!)

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